Delicious Freedom Syrup
| Video link to the :30 video, which will pop in a new window. |
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| I don’t know about this, I’m not ready |
If only trans fats and carbs had gotten on the ball and hired an advertising agency maybe we’d all be eating Oreos with 40 grams of delicious Freedom Fats®, with extra Carbolectrolytes®.
When I see this commercial I feel the same way I do when I see the Coal-Is-Awesome Council tell us that coal is delicious and children should freebase it for healthy bones and posture.
Confound the dread enemies of Delicious Freedom Syrup™ by asking: ‘Hey, you dang meanie, what’s so gosh darn awful about Freedom Syrup™ anyway?’ Watch as he can only just scratch his head, and eat your popsicle in defeat! (Stilted laughing optional)
Even if high fructose corn syrup isn’t worse than sugar, it’s as bad. It’s hard enough to educate Americans about eating correctly, do we really need zombies walking around arguing that high fructose corn syrup is as healthy as corn?
Seems like there’s another issue I forgot about. Oh right, corn is disproportionately subsidized by the U.S. government. And instead of being sold in semi-healthy cob form, it’s turned into magical diabetes juice, and injected into everything we eat and drink.
| Video link to the :30 video, which will pop in a new window. |
Comment // September 16th, 2008 // 2:20 pm
I think you mean to say “Even if HFCS isn’t worse than sugar…”
While watching this, I honestly thought he was stammering because he couldn’t think of a polite way to say “Rodent studies have shown that diets high in HFCS led to degeneration of reproductive organs.”
Comment // September 18th, 2008 // 9:35 am
Thanks, I really need an editor. Hey wait a minute..
Yeah this commercial just makes me want to punch the screen.
Comment // October 9th, 2008 // 5:23 pm
Yes, “moderation”. That’s a term you can use when the product is not injected into almost EVERY item sold in supermarkets.
P.S. I imagine cocaine is also fine in moderation.