This is NOT funky fresh as advertised

Take a look at this minute-long rapfest for TurboTax, starring a double-washed-up Vanilla Ice. Without knowing the background of this video, I can only speculate it is an attempt at viral marketing gone wrong. The low production values and “impromptu” rapping are bad, but not so hilariously bad it would be popular in any respect.

For a lesson in how to roast a white rapper while keeping a sense of humor about it, watch this Super Bowl ad for Nationwide, featuring an up-and-coming icon of washed-upedness, Kevin Federline.

If this video of Vanilla Ice isn’t supposed to be bad on purpose, it’s bad and tedious on accident. I don’t know which is worse. Wait, yes I do. The second one. That is what is worse.

Update: Duh, I found this on YouTube but didn’t link to the channel. There it is. There is the link. END TRANSMISSION

Share This

It was the weirdest episode of Reading Rainbow

This two minute mock video for the Axe ESP campaign is a good follow-up to our previous post about body spray commercials, and is one of my favorite things in the world: a parody of an awful commercial.

The video mocks home-shopping TV commercials and pokes some fun at its own campaign.

Explore their web site (danger: audio, maybe NSFW), and watch the actual video commercials that go along with this campaign.

Share This

(Sound of a metal-spring doorstop vibrating)

Before anyone gets too angry with me, the only thing ‘awful’ about these commercials are the implicit messages to men that body spray will have some kind of magic power over women. I think these spots are well done, and in the case of the Axe Body Spray commercial under review, will promptly drop everything to closely examine the spot for continuity errors when it comes on television.

This first collection of spots by RGX seem to be in response to the Axe body spray ads, trying to talk some reason into men who believe that swarms of supermodels will descend upon you if only enough body spray is applied. They certainly have picked a hot, alluring girl to communicate this message. The only problem is that men really will tend to be more easily influenced by visual messages and subconscious signals that are not difficult to process (like dialogue).

This spot does do a good job of positioning its product as an alternative for anyone experiencing Axe-back (negative connotations with the product because it seems to be so widely used and over-applied).

A horde of woman can skeletonize a human being in a matter of seconds in the Amazon basin

The above commercials for RGX, while very hot, just don’t have the wow factor of ads like this for Axe, featuring countless supermodels crossing the wilderness to close in on a man covering himself in body spray.

It doesn’t really matter if wearing too much of this stuff is obnoxious, as long as the commercial gets guys thinking more is better they are going to both buy the product, and use too much of it (ensuring they buy more of the product faster, thereby spending more money).

It’s hard enough to sell perfume to men, but while you’re at it you might as well take advantage of the fact they don’t know how to use it.

The jury is still out on these spots, and I feel as though I must continue watching them over and over before I render a final verdict.

Share This

It’s like someone threw up on the camera lens

While our crack writing staff assembles a special Friday commercial post, you might take in this website matching up food product photos with what they actually give you, via in4mador.

Nummy num! In the defense of fast food restaurants they aren’t always operating under ideal conditions. The real place I’d like to see some misrepresentation enforcement is in the discrepancy between realistic serving sizes and what are recommended serving sizes (and therefore the justifications for any claims of “healthy” portions) on everyday items in grocery stores.

Share This

When they knocked the tot out of my friend’s hand, I said nothing

Here’s another regional gem, this one from the Sonic fast food franchise. The commercial is pretty funny, a guy tries to eat a tater tot, and his friend smacks it away. Actually there is nothing funny about that, I get angry just thinking about it.

Sonic’s campaign comes off well, perhaps taking a clue from the low-budget “I’m Lovin’ It” McDonalds campaign and presenting the commercial with as little attention to production values as possible. Aside from just consisting of a few basic shots of two guys talking in their car, the quality of the video looks like radio-shack-bought camera quality. Maybe it’s supposed to look like a hidden camera. Maybe these are just two guys who don’t know they are being filmed. Oh man this is totally blowing my mind.

It all adds to the shtick of the spots, and is one of those strange examples of an awful commercial being very good.

(Oh there is more…)

Share This